It’s been months and no piece from me.

Nothing that seems like mine.

The last time I wrote, they were letters,

letters blurting out how I felt love in my heart.


I never write of love, only hurt.

I never write with smiles, only anger and pain.

Was I becoming jolly or masking it all in smiles?

No! That wasn’t possible.

I was good at writing in pain

behind my happy mask.


I have changed.

I am different.

I wake up smiling.

I greet the sun, the bathroom,

the pillows and the Lord.

I greet them all with lips wider than I’ve ever known.

I’m excited at the discoveries of a new dawn


On most days, I am grateful for life and another fresh start.

I am grateful for a chance to right my wrongs.

A chance to live and laugh again.

A chance to meet someone new.

To hear something different.

A chance to feel something beautiful.


I got so used to writing only in pain

that I could not think or imagine it any other way.

I only knew my dark side.

I only knew the tears on my keyboard

and notepads leaving the pages blurred out.


My creativity only flowed when my heart bled.

My joy never got a chance to shine

because it never met my pen.

It sat in the alley and let the sadness take the limelight.


I am still learning to express my happy heart.

To put my pen down and let my notepad experience excitement.

I am still learning to embrace this light and life.

It’s beautiful.

It’s free.

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